Poems and Songs

Bellows Music

Willieís portraits had the lot -

Lighting, pose, expression.

The only thing they hadnít got

Was decent definition.

Itís no go the Rolleiflex

Itís no go the Exa,

All I want is a light tight box

And a bottle-glass objective.

Goerdie took a high-speed shot

Of a racing car in action.

The only thing it hadnít got

Was an image on the emulsion.

Itís no go to Invercone,

Itís no go to Weston,

All I want is the setting fixed

At 1/100th f.11.

Sandy got some cotton wool

And swabbed his print with ferri,

Thought heíd made a colour print

When the whites turned lemon yellow.

Itís no go the M & B,

Itís no go the Johnsons,

All I want is the D & P

And nothing on my conscience.

Charlie did his ďmonthlyĒ print

Sent it round in a taxi,

When he heard the criticís jibes

He died of apoplexy.

Itís no go the EPS,

Itís no go the judging,

All I want is a straight result

And to hang with all the dodging.

With acknowledgement to Louis MacNieceís ďBagpipe MusicĒ 

 1963

 

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