Willieís portraits had the lot -
Lighting, pose, expression.
The only thing they hadnít got
Itís no go the Rolleiflex
Itís no go the Exa,
All I want is a light tight box
a bottle-glass objective.
Goerdie took a high-speed shot
Of a racing car in
The only thing it hadnít got
an image on the emulsion.
Itís no go to Invercone,
Itís no go to Weston,
All I want is the setting fixed
Sandy got some cotton wool
And swabbed his print with ferri,
Thought heíd made a colour print
the whites turned lemon yellow.
Itís no go the M & B,
Itís no go the Johnsons,
All I want is the D & P
nothing on my conscience.
Charlie did his ďmonthlyĒ print
Sent it round in a taxi,
When he heard the criticís jibes
died of apoplexy.
Itís no go the EPS,
Itís no go the judging,
All I want is a straight result
And to hang with all the dodging.
With acknowledgement to Louis MacNieceís ďBagpipe MusicĒ